the day
I found
him gone
found
I'd lost him
was the
day
I looked
for you
again
by turns
crying
until I
hyperventilated
and
hyperventilating
until I
cried
I did
both so hard
I could
do neither
effectively
stuck in
stuck
under
suffering
nothing
provided
relief
not the
booze
nor the
anger
a
useless surly drunkenness
feeding
itself
on
itself
you
looked sweetly at me
an
empathetic brightness
like a
green light above
a night
street
on your
roundness of face
open
then
dumbfounded
as I
propositioned you
not with
words
but with
body
swinging
it
swinging
limbs
over you
on your
mom's ex couch
grinding
mouth
and
tears
and
pelvis
might as
well have
been
humping the air
at least
it would've
met me
with a
few molecules
of
resistance
but you
didn't return
my
bearing
and
bearing down
didn't
even resist
as much
as you recoiled
in that
moment
fat with
raw
sadness
and
shame
and a
hard on
as
memory kicked me
where I
was soft
explaining
your
empathy
I once
left you
melancholy
embarrassment
and
blood
all
drained away
only
that angry lush
remained
unable
to see it
your way
unwilling
to relate
just
overflowing with fumes
rage and
questions
thickly
bouncing around my head
who'd
you look for
the
day you found me gone?
No comments:
Post a Comment